The “Ball” is not in your court and what it could mean

“The ball is in your court” is a phrase I’ve reflected on a lot these past twelve months but what happens when it’s in someone else’s and you struggle with not knowing if it’s coming your way or whether it will.

It may be for a reason we are yet to see either if it does or doesn’t

Silence can be one of the hardest things to deal with in life, no doubt about it. The waiting for a job opportunity, making the team, taking that extra step in that application process from “thankyou for your application unfortunately you weren’t successful this time” to “Your application was successful. ” It’s always easy when we have control of these things and have the “ball in our court” and as a society whether we deny it or not – we are hungry for this in our lives. 

One of the great life lessons and skills is to let that go – but our desire for things on a daily basis that fill our basket of wants and also needs can often get in the way. We are often advertised as needing complete control of our lives, finances, desires, fulfillment, and satisfaction. The list is really endless when you think about it. I believe from my own personal experiences that’s where the anxiety when we don’t have this grows.

The list is really endless and never runs out once you get control of that thing something else crops up, then that thing and often that control you get creates another thing out of that vicious cycle. It becomes draining and tiring chasing the ball around trying to be the only one with it in your hands.

You then become bitter, angry, upset and ultimately stop growing in character when you chase something that feels like it can never end. What shapes this is the belief you can achieve ultimate control in your own stead – but our lives reflect daily that simply is not possible and also is fraught with caution in the relationships we have daily with others. 

On this Good Friday – Jesus had complete control of the situation even when he was hanging on the cross – you would remember the story of the two robbers who were hanging next to him – one assumed he would just exercise his control and come down from there but the other knew this is the point he was trying to make about our lives and the many he would save for the decision he was going to ultimately make.

“One of the criminals who hung there hurled insults at him: “Aren’t you the Messiah?” Save yourself and us!” but the other criminal rebuked him. “Don’t you fear God,” he said, “since you are under the same sentence? We are punished justly, for we are getting what we deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong.” Then he said “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” 

Jesus answered him, “Truly I tell you today you will be with me in paradise” – Luke 23:39-43 NIV

In this one moment we see a convicted man relinquish the “ball in his court” and pass it to God because next to him was the one who shouldn’t even have to pass it or give up the open scoring opportunity – did the same by giving his trust in his very life to his Father in Heaven. 

There is far more context in this one moment that can be pulled apart including the other robber who couldn’t relinquish control himself –  however the key here is that if the one who always had the ball in his court chose to give it away to his father in heaven. 

Why can’t we? 

It is because of this one decision that we actually have freedom to have more balls in our courts to either score the open look, dish off to someone else to give them something they don’t have or make a play to get closer to the target in our life he wants to give us access to. 

Cause if you have the same ball constantly in your hands then how can someone freely pass you the one that grows your character, life opportunities, relationships and share his love with your community???

Sometimes the reason you have silence in your life journey is because someone out of nowhere is about to pass you the ball that God wants you to catch, hold onto for a bit then freely choose to pass on.

It’s called an assist for a reason – it’s the ultimate assist in life…

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What to do when “what is it now” repeats

It’s happened again – the common occurrence in my life and I feel everyone else’s.

That call, text, chat message, email which is often followed with the statement “we need to talk.”

Then comes the feeling “what is it now”…

Just like this room of blank pages at MONA - for another season in my life I was faced with the daunting situation of "what is it now" 

A statement that still can fill us with grief of different magnitudes, uncertainty, frustration and ultimately can result in change. Things won’t be the same as they were before or stay as you hoped.

Let’s be honest change we find difficult but it’s part of living in our everyday life – some are much bigger than others. 

There’s been a couple of recent ones I’ve been reflecting on in the past twelve months in my various roles. Some I’ve dealt with and others I have not. A new married life, home, and environment change have had their challenges but have all been for the better – and special at that.

Some have been through work situations, confronted with things that made me internally grieve about my shortcomings and inability to complete certain tasks, make that next step in my professional broadcasting career or not have what I need to be able to accomplish the goal I had in place at that very moment – a case of not no but not now.

We all want things to stay the same after all continuity is king in many different areas of life. The reality of this like keeping the same group of players together on a basketball team or running your groups the same as you’ve always wanted has to at some point in my experience run its course.

This is where the feeling of “what is it now” comes up. Our life has been smooth sailing for a while or things have remained continuous for some time but we know the next conversation we have means it will not be the same again. We also know that we can’t progress in the next chapter of our life without it.    

It’s okay to grieve at that moment this occurs as either what you’ve had whether good, bad, or devastating as a result of this moment means it will not be there again. 

Let me share a more recent example from a basketball sense.

I had a plan as a coach of one of the many teams I helped support to have my team play a certain style of basketball, certain plays and personnel. I got to the start of 2024 with all of this in place and after coming back from a successful tournament in Tasmania with the Australian Baptist Basketball Carnival – the reality hit me. What I had planned was not going to happen for various reasons and every effort to try and make that plan work failed. It was “what is it now” continuously and it weighed on me as a coach. I was frustrated and confused as to what I could do – then I remembered as a man of faith something I was told in the last 12 months.

I can’t remember who exactly but I can remember why – it was the reason we celebrate and reflect particularly this Good Friday annually.                           

I was reminded that sometimes we are given what we have and we should utilise what we have instead of asking for more. The way the situation was viewed changed – it wasn’t a “what is it now” it was a “what is he going to do about it.”       

Immediately I dived into what I had, I spoke to an NBL1 coach for advice, blew up my first plans and reformed new ones, enthused by this the team changed for the better and now we are a competitive unit again. I’ve had several moments like this over the past few months and I have hit the point of looking at what I have been truly blessed with. I start to now look at what I’m given resource-wise, supported with and when that “change” happens – it reduces the size and impact of the in-between period of transition.

On Good Friday 2024 – I encourage you to take a moment to consider what you do when things change. For me the man who died on the cross for our sins has given me all I need and some things he’s already set in motion for the future. When change happened in “his” times his very people didn’t do very well either with it. If you read Luke 4:16-30 (an account well portrayed in The Chosen Season 3 Episode 3 for those looking for a visual representation) this was meant to be the “it is now” but as pointed out by my pastor at my local church – our own viewpoint or expectations of what it should be can blind our very own ability to see the answer.

The Jesus we got is the Messiah we needed because today we know Jesus truly is the Son of God. Jesus’s offer isn’t around forever and you don’t want to end up like the people of Nazareth blinded to the Messiah when he is right in front of you – just because he wasn’t the Messiah that you were expecting.         

Pastor Dion – Lighthouse Community Church

For us, no matter what you believe the great wisdom of being able to see the moment “what is it now” and change the lens and viewpoint we use – can be the difference between dwelling on the past and moving forward into the future more mature, wise and knowing that we are not bound by our expectations.